One of the hardest things I had to fight while quitting my 30 year addiction to porn was the images stuck in head. Even now, it's a struggle. Some times I believe that I received freedom from that ball and chain to only find myself stuck behind a fence with true freedom just on the… Continue reading Things Seen Cannot Be Unseen
This broke my heart this morning.
I am sharing this, with permission, to say her husband’s comments are typical of an addict in denial. He’s not an addict yet he will not stop watching.
But what truly broke my heart was the fact that she has lost hope, not in herself, but in the marriage. To read more of A.R. and her struggle please visit her blog today and give her some inspiration and hope.
In my last post, I mentioned I found pornography on my husband’s computer again. I was not going to look at his history because I didn’t want to hurt myself even more. Yet, I had this compulsion to look. I scrolled down each day. Yes, he was looking at porn weekly. Porn Hub was a site I kept on running into and so was Google images. This information did not disturb me. I have come to accept the fact that these are his “go to” sites.
I found pornography on his computer on Friday. He was out of town that whole weekend. I had keep my anger and my vomit inside of me. I made sure this was not going to ruin my weekend with my girls. I kept on telling myself, “This is my husband’s addiction and I am not the cause.”
Late Sunday night he came home. This…
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The first time I heard this song I bawled my eyes out. I actually pulled over to the side of the road as I just could not concentrate. The lyrics just hit me in the gut. I am an ex-porn addict that started way too young. Be careful little eyes what you see. It's the… Continue reading It’s a Slow Fade
How many times have you prayed for a breakthrough, in whatever you are going through, wondering when it was coming? How many times have you looked at that, sometimes, overwhelming brick wall and have wondered if any of those bricks are going to fall so you can at least some light? I know I have.… Continue reading Come On God, When Will My Breakthrough Come?
What a simple yet very profound question. One I know has been asked many, many times in my life and by others. You don't have to be an addict, of any sort, to feel the need to ask that question. You could simply be struggling with finances, dealing with co-worker issues, battling depression or praying… Continue reading How Long Lord?
It popped up in my memories today on Facebook...on February 10th, six years ago I was sitting in a pew in a church in Alabama. I had been invited to Johnny Hunt's men conference by my pastor. He even paid for my ticket to go. Unbeknown to me the conference would be on pornography within… Continue reading Reflections On My Calling
There is something I have learned in the six months or so since returning to Celebrate Recovery...besides the fact that I still need it. Here it is...there are men and women, dads and moms that feel as if they have let their children down. And in a lot of ways. And I am one of… Continue reading Don’t Give Up Because Of Lost Time