Celebrate Recovery Is For Everyone

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12-Step Program, Alcoholism, Anger, Anxiety Issues, Celebrate Recovery, Co-Dependency, Depression, Divorce, Drug Addiction, Forgiveness, God, Healing, Hope, Jesus, Large Group, Life, Living Life On Life's Terms, Loss, Marital issues, Physical Abuse, Porn Addiction, Relational Issues, Richland Celebrate Recovery, Sexual Abuse, Sexual Sin, Small Group, Struggles, Suicidal Thoughts, Verbal Abuse, Worship

Why do people still believe Celebrate Recovery is just for addicts? Is it because they have seen the movie Home Run? Did they go to that bathroom or something during testimony night in the film, where the main character’s sister-in-law speaks of her sexual abuse as a child? Or could it be because everyone thinks only addicts need recovery?

I’ve been going to Richland Celebrate Recovery since it began at my church six years ago, with the exception of a small hiatus. I’ve seen many people come and go over the years for various reasons; mostly, because they move back home upon coming out their recovery program.

I’ve written about CR (Celebrate Recovery) many times on my blog and I talk a lot about it in general, yet people still see it as a place for addicts. Let me say for the record…yes, addicts attend CR, BUT that is NOT all it is about.

Here is what Celebrate Recovery is…

It is a Christ centered program for people. PEOPLE!

It’s not just for the addict…it’s for the hurting, the lonely, the habitual sinner, the depressed and the list can go on and on. It’s a place for people with hurts, habits and hang-ups. It’s a place for healing.

When I started going to CR it was basically to help as a volunteer for our church’s newest ministry. I had heard about it and supported it. Little did I know…I needed it for me.

At the time I was going through my separation/divorce, not being able to see my kids everyday, depression, anger and trying to stop a long struggle with viewing porn and low self-esteem among other things.

I would have gone absolutely bat crazy had it not been for CR and the conversations and prayer from dear friends during all that.

Here’s the thing. A lot of people who struggle, with anything, sometimes feel as if they are the only ones dealing with that particular issue. And many of them feel that if they share their struggle with anyone, they will be looked upon differently…basically judged. And yet we can’t judge and here is why…we are all sinners and fall short of the glory God.

God sees no sin greater than the other, yet He sent His Son, Jesus Christ to die for all. All is all, no matter what it is. It could be adultery, drinking in excess, lying, sexual immorality, gluttony, murder, stealing, idolatry, etc.

The thing is, if we are honest with ourselves, we all have hurts, we all have habits that may not follow in line with scripture, and we all have hang-ups of some form or fashion.

CR is for everyone!

I go for the worship and message and still feel the prompting of the Holy Spirit to repent of something or to make amends with someone.

It’s honestly hard to explain. Heck, we have a 70-year-old lady who attends and our youngest is a 17-year-old  young lady. Everyone gets something out of the message no matter what they are going through at that moment. That’s just how God works.

The small groups are more intimate and allows each person the chance to either share how the message applies to their situation or just share what’s on their heart. Small groups have been a source of healing for me just by letting things out. You know…my life verse…confess your faults one to another. James 5:16 is so powerful.

Allow me to ask you guys a few questions.

Are you depressed? Do you have anxiety issues? Are you feeling alone after losing a loved one whether by death or the break-up of a relationship? Do you suffer from over eating? Are you addicted to sweets? Do you drink in excess to the point of losing control of who you are? Are you hurting from the wounds of words spoken? Do you have low self-esteem? Have you ever been sexually molested? Have you been physically or verbally abused?

If you answered yes to any of those, Celebrate Recovery is for you.

Give it a try! Allow the Lord to lead you. Go to the Celebrate Recovery website and see if there are any local chapters.

I have a list of all the ones in Louisiana, here on my blog site and keep it updated as best I can.

If you choose to attend please let me know how you enjoyed it and if it ministered to you.

God Bless,
Stu

The Depths

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Daily Inspiration, Despair, Forgiveness, God, Hope, Psalms 18:16, Sin, The Depths

It does not matter how deep you feel you are in sin…God’s love is deeper. No matter the depth of your despair…God’s love is deeper.

Call on His name.

Is There Hope For The Harlots And Johns?

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Addict, Addictions, Freedom, God, Harlot, Hope, Johns, Lust, Porn Addiction, Pornography, Prayer, Praying for the Porn Star, Prostitution, Sexual Abuse, Struggles, Victim

Harlot, prostitute and whore, these are some of the older terms that have been used to describe people who practice certain sexual activities outside the bonds of marriage. I am sure that those terms could be used to describe certain spouses back in the day as well.

Now-a-days we use the term slut or sexually deviant more frequently than harlot and whore. There is also a term that most have never heard of before and that is a strumpet.  All of these are harsh words; we use to describe a person who has promiscuous sexual activity, usually for cash. But it can be used to acquire things such as drugs or other favors up to and including just plain sexual gratification. All reference a person involved in fornication, except for the person paying for said sex. They are called Johns.

On both sides of the equation are victims. Some may not actually view either as a victim but I can attest to the fact…they are.

You have these women who want to become a model or actress. They want the lime-light. They want to be famous. So how does it start? Many respond to ads online that say free airfare to so and so…apply now.

The models can wind up with the wrong type of business manager who sees dollar signs. They set them up with steamy photo shoots and the clothing becomes less and less to the point where there is no clothing at all. Do they so no? Maybe…maybe not. But for those that say no I am sure their manager tells them they will never work again if they do say no. These managers become “pimps” by exploiting these women or men and their bodies. And the innocent model, looking for fame, turns into a paper porn star.

Many want out quickly only to find out that they are stuck, as the free airfare did not say roundtrip. If they leave…they do so broke. I heard one story the other day of a girl who made a butt ton of cash only to end up with a little over two grand because these girls have to buy their own make-up and lingerie for the shoots.

And then you have the aspiring actress or actor that comes to town looking for the spotlight. Finds an ad and responds. Goes to the agent’s office and signs on the dotted line without ever truly reading the contract. Only to find out that the contract is one that will require their very soul. They are now an adult actress/actor, shedding his or her clothes and having sex for pay.

Are they victims? Some are and some are not. Some know what they are getting into and yet others are coerced and/or forced. Those are the true victims of the adult industry. .

Regardless of their way of becoming what they turned into, they have clients/johns. You know who they are. It is the guys and girls who buy the magazines and movies. It is the ones who sit at the computer or on their phone and click on the links searching for that perfect scene with the perfect shot. These are the johns…paying for their services in one form or another.

Can these clients/johns be victims? Many say they are not but I differ in opinion. The definition of the term victim is (1) a person who suffers from a destructive or injurious action or agency and (2) a person who is deceived or cheated, as by his or her own emotions or ignorance, by the dishonesty of others, or by some impersonal agency. So…going by said definition…yes, they can be victims.

Now, I am not talking about the ones driving around in their car looking to score. Those johns are not victims. They know exactly what they are doing both physically and mentally.

I am talking about the ones looking at the mags and the movies. Some of these truly are victims as some were molested in their younger years. And the only way for them to deal with the pain is to go deeper into the thing that hurt them…sexual fantasies.

Others run across porn completely by accident on Facebook, Twitter, Tumbler or just searching for things on their computer. There are so many ways to become a john now. And though most sites are “free” you still have to pay your internet bill. So yes, they are being paid for their services.

And since the porn industry does not care about anything except the mighty dollar, they do not care who runs across one of their sites or sees the cover of one of their magazines…even a nine year old. They are most certainly an impersonal agency.

Sad when you have a victim hurting another victim of the system without even realizing what they are doing to each other. I believe that, aside from the lack of God in their lives, is where part of the problem is. Neither side realizes the damage being done to the other.

The porn addict does not fully understand what goes on behind the scenes during a “scene” for a film. Much less, how those scenes affect the actor/actress when they go home for the day. As many turn to drugs and alcohol to dumb the pain both physically and mentally.

And most porn stars do not realize that they are literally killing the person who is watching or looking at their product. They are not only hurting the viewer but the viewer’s girlfriend/wife, children, career, body, mind and soul.

Can these harlots and johns be saved from the devastating grip of an industry that does not care about either one’s well-being? Is there hope? I say the answer is YES!

Praying for them is a start. But prayer is not the end all means of releasing them from their bondage. Do not get me wrong as I truly believe in the power of prayer but there must be action as well. And I am NOT talking about bashing them over the head with Bible, calling them out, or anything to that affect. We have enough “Christians” doing that for us. I am talking about reaching out to them in love.

Did you know that you can email a porn star and just let them know that you are praying for them without demeaning them in any form or fashion? You can actually email them your pray so they can actually read it and possibly say it out loud.

Heck, you can even walk down your street in prayer for all the women and men who are struggling behind closed doors. Your prayers will be heard and have a positive impact as about half of the men on your street view porn on a regular basis. And it is about one third for women at moment and climbing.

If you have struggled and are having victory are you sharing your story with others?

Are you offering the porn addict an ear and a heart that they can share their issues to?

If not you should be…marriages are at stake! Families are at stake! The future is at stake!

Would you please join me in praying for the harlots and the johns as well as speaking out against pornography and its effects? Will you join me in being an ear to a hurting soul?

God Bless guys,

Stu

My Path Out of Porn Addiction: A Therapist’s Journey

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Addict, Addiction, Freedom, Hope, Journey, Porn, Pornography, Struggles

A small glimpse into an ex-addict who has turned not only his life around but others as well. Forest & I have similar backgrounds in the fact that we both started our “education in the field” at the age of 12 and we both want to help others find freedom. There are plenty of links within this post to some wonderful information. Go check it out!

Help us help others by sharing any post you feel will help someone.

God Bless,
Stu

LifeSTAR Central Valley Blog

When I recently wrote about my promotion to Clinical Director and the career journey that led me to this work I love to do, I omitted a significant piece of my history. We all have a back-story. It is ours to hold or to share. I would like to show you a snapshot of mine. I reserve the intimate details for the handful of trusted individuals in my “inner circle.” But I believe that what follows will enrich the lives of others, so I am honored to give this gift to those who can benefit.

The reality is that I have studied sexual addiction much longer than the 9 years of my graduate and post-graduate work. My education in the “field” of porn addiction began when I was 12 years old, when I was first introduced to pornography at a friend’s house. I was a prime candidate for addiction, burdened…

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Despair

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Addiction, Adultery, Alcholism, Despair, Divorce, Drugs, God, Grief, Homelessness, Hope, Lord, Pornography, Prayer, Redemption, Sex, Struggles, Warfare

Lord, this world needs a Savior

This whole notion of keeping up with the Jones’ is quite literally tearing the family apart.

What started off several generations ago as trying to be better off than my parents has nearly destroyed marriage completely.

We have married couples that do not get to spend time together because they work so much to make ends meet.

We have parents who…might…get to see their children for a total of eight hours a week. It’s not right! I know this was not part of your plan.

We have husbands and wives sitting in the same room that text one another instead of actually having a conversation face to face. So sad.

We have more homeless people than ever before.

We have more broken homes than I care to think about.

We have more and more people becoming addicted to various things in order to just cope with life. I know for a fact, that is not part of your design God.

We have babies (basically) raising babies with the help of the state.

We have young girls and boys being molested by family or friends.

We have young women and men selling their bodies for sex..some willingly..many more against their will.

Many of your children are being kidnapped, raped and killed before they even get the chance to know who you are much less know you.

Parents are losing their children in tragic ways too early in life. It’s leaving behind a lot of sadness and despair.

Everywhere I look I see despair with little hope. It hurts me Lord to know that what this world needs it does not want. They do not want the real you.

Where do I fit in?

What can I possibly do Lord to show hope to a dying and lost world?

Lord there are so many days that I just can not take any more…then I bend my knees…and pray.