Dear Struggling Friend

Dear friend,

Are you hurting right now? Are you sitting with your head tucked between your knees, crying in shame because you have given in to temptation? Are you lying in bed with a stained pillow from the tears being shed as you try to figure out what in the world is going on?


You may think you have it all under control, yet you stop to get a quick drink on your lunch break because the stressors at work and home have you in a whirlwind.

Could it possibly be that you are looking at porn during your break on your phone so your boss will not catch you?

Maybe your quick fix is having sex whenever possible even if your spouse is at home waiting. But you justify it by telling yourself that your spouse is not giving you the satisfaction you feel you deserve.

Maybe you are that single man who is trying to figure out who you are sexually. You love sex with women and yet find yourself drawn to men. Could be you have experimented. Or possibly you are that man who goes to the rest areas looking for a quickie then stays for several more and more. Do you stop when two man come to you at the same time asking for it or do you say what the hell…let’s do it?

Are you fearful because your last sexual encounter was so extreme and intense that you forgot protection and didn’t care when the time came? Now your concerned..have I caught something.

Maybe that extreme sexual encounter has caused you to crave more and you are trying with all your might to fight the urges.

Maybe you are concerned that the pain meds are becoming a crutch and the fact that you are…now…indeed addicted to them. You want to stop…but…

Maybe you are just depressed because nothing is going as it should. You feel as if everything is just spiraling out of control and you have just given up.

Could be that you are suffering in silence while showing the world a face that is fake. Happy on the outside but totally miserable on the inside.

Are you upset with yourself for having those feelings of doubt and despair?

Are you tired of giving in and getting that quick fix?

It does not matter the scenario that you are in…someone else has been there before you…

And someone somewhere is going through it right now. Maybe the situations are a little different but the emotions and feelings are the same.

I, personally, have been in many of these situations. Many nights were there tears running down my face onto my pillow. Many times would I feel the quilt of a sinful life and hang my head in shame and regret, yet not truly knowing how to get out.

It wasn’t until I came to realize that I personally, on my own power, could never change the person I was. It wasn’t until I gave my complete life over to God did things start to change.

By my doing that changes took place on the inside. I started seeing things in a different light. I saw myself as a being who was loved by his Creator. A Creator, God, who loved me enough to allow His son to die for my sinfulness. As I prayed and talked to Him my desires changed.

I started getting into the Bible and applying the scripture to my life. I studied. Not that I could help others, though that eventually is what God called me to do, but to help myself. I have come a long way in my recovery from my addictions…thank God!

I have been down that dark road. Please understand that if you desire a change in your life I am willing to help you walk down your road. But know that I will do so in a Godly manner and by His guidelines and not the world’s.

I am a man who not only wants to live a Godly life but has a burning desire to see others set free from their addictions and walk in freedom with integrity.

God bless,


Originally posted July 30th 2015

3 thoughts on “Dear Struggling Friend”

  1. I found that I was NEVER going to find freedom until I sought HELP. May those who are hurting reach out and find those who are willing to help and know what to do. There are answers. I love my new life. The Lord is always ready to help those who will open up and seek help.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Very good post Stu, very good. You are not wasting any of the things God has taught you through your trials and struggles. God will use our addictive sins to mature us into being like Him. He waste nothing.

    Liked by 1 person

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