Code Purple: Dollars And Sense

Here is the devotional:

You and your bride just got back from your honeymoon, and things are going perfectly. Over coffee in the morning, one of you mention that you’d like to work on your budget together. The other person stops in mid coffee sip and looks at you as if you have a third eye. A what? You repeat that you’d like to talk about a budget so you can plan for tithing, saving, spending and all the things that come with life.

What both just realized is that someone grew up without a budget and one did. That could be a very delicate conversation to have. I grew up in a family that was check-to-check. I had to save money just to pay my car insurance and have gas money. Back then it was a 5.00 gas stop. Filling up my car with gas was for rich folk. My wife grew up with uncashed checks on her dresser from her job in high school and family. That didn’t compute in my world. There was no dust on my money from sitting still.

Money is one of those things that people struggle with most of their lives. Money makes you say strange things like, “I deserve this” or “I need this.” People shop out of depression and insecurity more than you think. I had a friend who I worked with who was having car issues, money issues, family issues on top of a 90-minute one-way drive to work. He came in, and I asked him how his weekend was. He said he and his wife purchased a whole living room set. I asked if they had been shopping long for that. He said, “no, they were feeling depressed over the weekend, and this was supposed to make them feel better.” Notice he said, “was supposed to…”.

If managing money is tricky, talking about the topic is even harder. You may want to open the discussion in prayer and set the bar at, “Lord this is your money…not ours.” It’s important to understand that so you can know that you are trying to be good stewards with God’s money. That alone should change the way each of you saves and spends money.

Uncommen Questions:

Do you and your spouse approach money the same way?

What do you do to put God first in your finances?

Uncommen Challenge:

Spend time in prayer, time in study and time discussing your finances but discuss out of love and not out of selfishness.

Here are the scriptures referenced:

Let your speech be always with grace, seasoned with salt, that ye may know how ye ought to answer every man.
Colossians 4:6 KJV

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For the love of money is the root of all evil: which while some coveted after, they have erred from the faith, and pierced themselves through with many sorrows.
1 Timothy 6:10 KJV

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Here are Stu’s thoughts:

Man, this is tough one.

Being a good steward of just about anything is hard at times.

Listen people say that there are more monetary problems in marriage than there are sexual problems. I believe they are about neck and neck because  not every spouse speaks up about either issue….they just silently implode.

Now sometimes they explode! But neither one does any good to the spouse or the marriage.

I imploded. I just went deep into depression. She exploded and the result was divorce. That and something I will not divulge of course. It’s never just one things. It is always an accumulation of things that are not openly and honestly discussed.

I’ll be honest. Nowadays it really takes two incomes to survive comfortably especially if you have children.

Now this applies to married couples. I’m not telling any single parent to marry or even live with someone just to make ends meet. That is the wrong reason for marriage much less a partner.

I’m like the author in this one now but there was a time in my youth where money was not an issue. But that was a different time. The world got greedy!

I lived by the 10 dollar gas rule. I felt my car would literally explode if I ever filled it up. It wouldn’t know how to act. It might have driven like a drunken car 😂😂

But hey that went almost a full week back and forth to Monroe for work.

My money now is gone pretty much before I even see it. I do get to say oh cool…it’s payday. Then poof…bills.

But I have also been on a budget and kept it for the most part but something always came up. I didn’t save for the what ifs. But my money lasted longer on a budget. I also didn’t have kids at the time either…lol.

You know what really helped? Tithing.

Now I know that CAN be a touchy subject for many as the debate continues over the 10% rule and was it just for the Israelites and is it applicable to Christians today.

I have my questions on it to but I still believe in my heart that tithing is the right thing to do but right now my funds are so tight it is almost impossible. I’m counting pennies by the end of the week.

⬆️⬆️⬆️Is that one of those praising God but putting myself above Him in conversation moments? Or providing necessary information to get the point across? I’m not sure.

But as I was saying money can be a huge problem in marriage especially if one is a saver and the other is a spender. And could be detrimental if both are spenders. Bill and needs must always come first. Toys are last.

It does not matter if you have never had a budget or you have lived by one for years….praying over purchases is something I see lacking in our society as a whole. Not necessarily see but I don’t hear many married people speak about it, let me put it that way.

Impulse buying can be fun and even exhilarating but that purchase may but you in a bind in a few weeks. Take time to pray over whatever the purchase is. Make sure you truly need or want it but don’t buy it just yet. If after paying all the bills and needs are met then by all means make the purchase and enjoy a little fruit from your physical labor. *talking to myself here*

Here is a simple prayer that you and your spouse can say…

Father, we thank you for the opportunity and ability to work. We know this money we have earned is because of gifts you have given us. May we use this money wisely ensuring that all bills are paid and all needs are met so that we can be good stewards of what you have given us.

Amen

  

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Hopefully this all makes sense.