Sex: Myth #3 Sex Is To Be Done One Way. There Is No Room For Exploration.

Yesterday we unearthed the biblical truth that we are to take delight in our spouse, and mutually, in one another’s body. However, we are given the freedom through Scripture to enjoy and explore the gift of one another’s body. We can take delight in our sexual adventures with our spouse, while also holding true to boundaries set forth in Scripture.

When it comes to what is and what isn’t allowed in Christian sex, there aren’t a ton of details offered in Scripture. When a man and woman who are married follow God’s Word about treating one another with respect and devotion, they’re practicing God-honoring sex.

If you’re single, you can still start setting a foundation of purity for your future marriage by having healthy views on what honors God today.

It wouldn’t be godly to engage in a sexual behavior if it would hurt, embarrass, or be displeasing to either partner. It wouldn’t be godly to bring pornography into your marriage—or to consume it before you’re married—because that’s not following Jesus’ warnings about lusting.

God’s Word gives a lot of freedom within the bounds of the marriage bed to explore and enjoy your sexual relationship with your spouse, but as you do, remember Romans 12:10 NIV: Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves.

Brandon, LMFT-S, PCIT

Find helpful ideas for quitting porn

Here are the scriptures referenced:

Be kindly affectioned one to another with brotherly love; in honour preferring one another;
Romans 12:10 KJV


Stand fast therefore in the liberty wherewith Christ hath made us free, and be not entangled again with the yoke of bondage.
Galatians 5:1 KJV


For, brethren, ye have been called unto liberty; only use not liberty for an occasion to the flesh, but by love serve one another.


For all the law is fulfilled in one word, even in this; Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself.
Galatians 5:13‭-‬14 KJV


So speak ye, and so do, as they that shall be judged by the law of liberty.
James 2:12 KJV


Here are Stu’s thoughts:

First off, there are no scriptures that tell us what positions to be in when having sex, though oral sex is mentioned for both genders in Song of Solomon. I believe that is why this particular Bible Study entry is short and doesn’t really address much.

So this really is Stu’s thoughts so…nah…I’ll behave. Can’t give away all the fun stuff!

The missionary position has a lot of back story behind it and it varies from culture to culture.

Some say that missionaries told certain tribes that were having sex in the rear entry position that the only clean way to have sex in the eyes of the Lord was with the man on top😮 Which is sort of funny when you think about. Rear entry would be the cleanest position for them being they did not have “beds”, a carpeted or tiled floor.

Some have said that this position is best because of the insemination process. Think about this for a second…they used gravity as a reason 🤦

And yet one place has stated that the man being on top shows the male dominance side of the picture…but has no historical facts to back that up. And I totally disagree with male dominance in the bedroom!!

Ok, so now we have an idea as to why the missionary position became so popular.

Don’t get me wrong I love the missionary position as it, to me, is the most intimate of positions. The closeness of each other’s bodies and being able to look into each other’s eyes. Love the looking into eyes part.

But any sexual position can be intimate IF done in the proper way and out of love for your partner!

Woman on top is a prime example. It gives the woman complete control in the depth and rhythm of the thrusts. Plus it gives the man a nice view 😊

There are soooo many positions out there it’s crazy.

Here’s a verse that they did not include in their study…

Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge.
Hebrews 13:4 KJV

Which means that the marriage bed is pure & untainted.

Bringing porn into the marriage bed would certainly defile it.

Bringing another person into the marriage bed would certainly defile it whether physically or emotionally.

Bringing things into the marriage bed that could hurt the one you love could defile it.

THOSE are the wrong ways to experiment in bed!

The right way is to have fun! Don’t be scared to try new positions. You may find one that rocks your world!

Standing up with her legs wrapped around your waist is great but can hurt you both. So be careful.

If missionary is all you have known try the edge of the bed position.

If she likes riding cowgirl style try reverse cowgirl.

If one hurts don’t do it again.

I could list all the cool positions I have tried but I would probably get carried away and shock a few of you…so…I will share this.

Here is a link to a great site started by a Christian couple. The site is nudity free. They draw the characters. They give a brief explanation of how the position works and what your body needs to do to into said position…

So here ya go…

Christian Friendly Sex Positions

Go check ’em out. Discuss together and experiment in bed. Enhance your sex life. But do it all out of love for your spouse and have their pleasure in mind!

4 thoughts on “Sex: Myth #3 Sex Is To Be Done One Way. There Is No Room For Exploration.”

  1. Yassss! These are great Stuart!

    Thank you for going there. You never hear this kind of stuff taught in the Church. They need a class just for this subject. Hmmm…. I can see that announcement:

    We have added a new class this week for anyone who would like to join. It’s called, “How to have fun in the bedroom (yes, it’s perfectly okay) and not look like a constipated, miserable person all the time”. Sign up sheets are in the west foyer. Y’all have a great week!

    Annnnndddd THIS kind of stuff is why I get looks from my mother when I’m playing around at Church. 😀

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I love the slogan😂😂

      No, this is not taught from behind the pulpit. Hence the reason sex is such an issue in marriages.

      It’s not shown as fun, exciting and pleasurable but rather boring, an act out of marital duty or Procreation only 😥

      Liked by 1 person

      1. You do?!! 😊 I get in trouble too much, but you just… let me be me. I feel safe letting my fun side show whenever you are around. I’m glad you enjoy my particular brand of humor Stuart. 😂

        Exactly! So sad. It needs to stop. The world shouldn’t have all the fun. Sex and pleasure were God’s idea to begin with and I say we take it back!!!

        This is my saying after… (you know 😉), “There must be a God somewhere and He LOVES me!!!” 😎

        Liked by 1 person

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