Here is his comment (used with permission, though it’s not like you can’t go and read the comment on the post..duh. But I do always ask first before sharing.
John ~ ….But I started drinking myself… I forgot what I did or even what I said, but I made my wife cry one night. It was my awakening moment. I was starting down my father’s path. I rerouted! Praise God!
Me ~ I’m sorry that you made your wife cry but I praise God, indeed, that you took that as a message for change brother!
John ~ I was sorry too! Lol… and it’s that sorrow that can change things. Alcohol was fun, but it’s not worth my marriage and quality of life.
John’s comments really got me thinking.
Whatever he did to hurt his wife caused her to cry. And upon seeing her tears and possibly the look on her face caused a change in his heart about his drinking. He stopped because his marriage was more important than the “fun” of drinking.
So…this was my thought. A thought that turned into a question…that turned to anger and then sadness.
Why, when our spouses cry, do we not act accordingly as to not hurt them in that manner anymore?
Why, men, why do we not stop looking at porn when we see the pain it causes our spouse?
When she finds out and breaks out in tears, why do we not stop?
Why, even after saying the apologies of I’m sorry it will never happen again, do we keep looking?
Why do we not seek help at that moment?
What’s more important our pride or the ones we love?
It is one thing to get in an argument over something stupid like the dishes, the toothpaste or toilet paper and she ends up crying because she is exhausted and you just hit the last nerve.
It is a totally different matter when your behavior is what is causing the love of your life to cry!!
You have to change…not her!
I do not care what she has or has not done for you in the bedroom you choose to look at porn! YOU!
More than likely your porn usage was there when you were dating but did NOTHING at all to try to stop and you probably never told her.
Now you have been found out. Your sin and your shame brought to light.
But now, even her tears will not change your behavior. That’s sad.
Here is why it is sad. If you do not change she will. Her trust in you will change. Her actions towards you will change. Her love for you will change. Her sexual desire for you will change.
Are those things worth losing over the unsatisfying and unfilling porn usage.
Whatever the core reason for you watching porn is…you need to find it, confront it, rebuke it, repent and change.
And do not just change for your spouse! Change for you! Change for those little ones who watch everything….
BEFORE THE TEARS FALL!!